Monthly Archive for April, 2008

Been sick, been tired, been hiding and other Confessions

Published on April 30, 2008 by Corinna Carlson | 0 Comments

When I get sick I am a pretty big baby combine that with seasonal allergies and night time barfing and things have been fantastic!

Boooo last Friday I had to cancel therapy re: being sick, no girl time re: being sick and I had only been looking forward to that for WEEKS! Adam is sick as well so we’ve been passing this shit back and forth and at first I wasn’t snotty I just felt EXTRA balloon migraine head with MILD head cold, NOW I’m getting full head cold and snotty. YAY! I’ve been having really awesome night sweats as well and I haven’t been forgetting to take my crazy people tits and so therefore I can not pin point a reason other than being SICK.

sleeping... in MY SPOT!

In other news, The Greeper has a new place that she likes to sleep. Pretty exciting shit eh? I know, I thought so too until it turned out she’s serious and has taken over half the spot I sleep in. She has of course had other phases, other places she goes back to. The fashion box, the tent, I’m sure she will get bored of sleeping right below BUT almost ON my pillow soon.

bottom of a yawn

oh yes, she has her own TENT! complete with hanging bell.

Our camera is not back from being fixed yet so we had to buy a back up one. We couldn’t delay the monkeys any more due to lack of photos, but at the same time we HAVE to be able to take photos of our product. This issue of course led us into a discussion of other things that could happen to slow us down, when we are just about done with a lot of the start up necessities and can now work on picking up our production pace. I mentioned that there would come a time that we’d make a monkey, look at it, hate it or it would not meet our quality standards and we’d have to start over. Really, did I say that out loud? Because it happened the monkey after I said it! YAY! We have informed the buyer, I figure honesty is best, there is only two of us and both of us had a hand in it sucking so we’ve had to start over. Now we have a physically challenged monkey in our apartment, at least Dr. Vegas finally has a monkey that isn’t going anywhere to play with mostly because it is blind and can’t speak. Once that red thread goes on for the mouth the suckers don’t shut up. Banana this, poo in your face that.

My Dad is supposed to be dropping two boxes of stuff off to Adam and I on Saturday, some of my stuff, some stuff they are giving us, some stuff that has been in the family forever that I am taking because I’m the last member of our family and I don’t want it leaving the family till I die I guess. Small problem though, my Dad and I got into one of our infamous fights today. Oh how I love them. Always in regards to the exact same issue(s) hidden by topics seemingly cloaked in difference that spread years, weeks, months some just days – we some how manage to piss each other off regularly even when not in big fights. My mom is going to be all upset now and that’ll be my entire fault too, I’m sure. Super awesome, we both resort to behavior befitting that of two year olds and just generally spin in circles for a while. Fun times. We have worked hard on things as a family but my Dad and I, man we’ll just always scrap, sadly that is just how we are, we can’t seem to communicate in any sort of healthy way. Wonder how many more phases this move to Bali holds in store for us.

Just finished my fifth book of the year leaving me three behind my minimum quota for 2008, I will get off my ass and post on them soon. This year has been good so far aside from The Time Travelers Wife. EWWWW.

EARTH DAY NERD ALERT!!

Published on April 22, 2008 by Corinna Carlson | 13 Comments

smithersstory.jpg

Blast from the past!

Grade Seven, 1990 I was already down with the environment. This story got chosen to go in the paper as a special insert paper, only one kid got picked from each class. Small town paper and all, but it was still cool.

Click on it if you can’t read it, although it is pretty bad, only grade seven and I already cared about the Earth though WOOT!

Happy Earth Day!! And may we all learn how to treat everyday like Earth Day.

smithersstorypage2.jpg

Dude Hasn’t Blogged in a While…..

Published on April 17, 2008 by Corinna Carlson | 0 Comments

So I will go BULLETS on you.

  • Every single time one of us sits at the computer Gus jumps straight onto a lap she has her head buried in my arm right now. She is the most adorably cute annoying cat in the world.
  • Adam hurt himself at work and has been off here and there and so I’ve had to carry some heavy shit and;
  1. it made me wonder how the hell I was ever as independent as I was
  2. someone held the back door to the apartment building open for me, I made it all the way up the stairs to my floor and swung the door open so I could let it hit me in the back to go through but I didn’t move far enough over and the door knob NAILED me so hard that it happened on Monday and I still have pain shooting in a couple of directions and a massive LUMP.
  • COMING SOON!!! HUGE and I mean HUGE MOOOOO-VIE post. While we make monkeys we watch movies, mostly movies we’ve seen or I watch them twice or vise versa, some will be old and some will be new movies. I feel that my one liner-ish reviews are generally better than if I go all out anyway.
  • Speaking of movies, and forgive me as I’ll probably repeat some of this somewhere down the road but I FINALLY got my hands on a copy of Into the Wild BUT now I’m afraid to watch it, WHY? Because see, I read the book in April 2005 [NERD ALERT/reminder: I date all of my books when I finish them] I have also read most of Jon Krakauer’s other books. The book Into the Wild is a 199 pages, with epilogue 203. I had this funny feeling having just watched two movies of perfect length so I looked at Into the Wild and saw that it is 143 minutes. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? I’m now convinced that Krakauer and Penn are conspiring against all of man kind, how the HECK does a 199 page book become a 143 minute movie? Krakauer wrote Into the Wild before he became known for being an arrogant thinks he knows it all, extremely repetitive journalist [NOT SAYING HE HASN'T BEEN THROUGH A LOT re: Everest] but seriously is half this fucking movie going to be Penn and Krakauer masturbating their egos and Krakauer getting us back for writing such a short book in comparison? I guess I’ll see once I watch it.
  • Also coming soon a very personal review of Dry, Augusten Burroughs, [who has a new book out on April 29 YAY!] and I wasn’t planning on reviewing it at all but I have a few things to say about The Last Days of Socrates, Plato. Once I start talking about the damn Socrates I can’t shut up now, I feel similar to how I felt after I read 1984.
  • OUR CAMERA IS BROKEN!!!!!! On one hand I feel really lame getting so upset over a materialistic possession but our camera is not just a play toy for us anymore we NEED it for our business so we are pretty stressed about it or rather I am, Adam doesn’t really stress much about anything in life. I have a couple tricks up my sleeve to hopefully get some photos of two monkeys that will be done this weekend and HOPEFULLY by the time the Jedi one is done THAT IS RIGHT A JEDI ONE, the camera will be fixed. I don’t pray but if you do please say a prayer for our new business. All start ups have glitches. We’ve officially hit a glitch.
  • I finally had the pleasure of meeting Raul over the last weekend at Tanya’s housewarming party. I am like the last blogger in Vancouver to meet him I think. He was everything he has been talked up to be and more! I was the one at the party with the sippy cup. I had every intention of joining y’all at Every Third Tuesday this month because the Hamburgler [Monica Hamburg] was the speaker, I call her a friend, she doesn’t read my blog, that is cool man, but she is rad, I heard she did a great job, sorry I missed it, been taking care of my dear husband yo.

KITTY!! DARGON!! ABC & CAC!

  • We now have our FOURTH coffee pot in less than two years. The first one I broke in a tantrum of mass destruction, although I was not TRYING to break the coffee pot I just forcefully put it under the tap and knocked it into something. THEN Sarah and Jack bought us a rad coffee pot for a wedding gift [can't find the post re: FUCKED archives] but even though we know at least four other couples/people who have that coffee pot and they ALL still have it ours broke!! WOOOOOOOOOOO! RIGHT after the warranty was done, probably the day after. I then bought a $24.99 twelve cup coffee pot, cheapest one I could find. Last week the heating plate went on it. Adam likes burnt coffee I blame him. SO I bought YET another coffee pot, and this one makes loud noises and I want to throw it out the window and I don’t have the box to take it back because I am a recycling freak and actually get excited about the amount of things I have to recycle and FUCK now I have to wait out this shit coffee pot, watch it last ten years, seriously.

Ps. Dr. Vegas is always a mentor to the Sock Monkeys, he always gives em’ some advice before they leave our infantry but this particular monkey the Dr. really took to. They had a pretty awesome jam session before he departed, Vegas has already shown off his guitar though so he took it off for the photo.

hermanos

The Energy you put out: It’s a Choice

Published on April 11, 2008 by Corinna Carlson | 0 Comments

The last key piece of bringing something around full circle, sometimes it isn’t even so much of an epiphany as it is a readiness within me to receive, process and action the information.

The last year maybe two, you lose track of time when you’ve been going for so long, of my therapy has been heavily concentrated on learning how to breathe properly, getting in touch with my inner body feeling the breath as it enters the exact cavity I aim it into. I also took some Pilates to get in touch with my core with secondary hopes of being able to run competitively against MYSELF again. I have disks on breathing I have paper work on it, we talk about it in session all the time, it is pretty mind boggling that breathing properly can be hard. That it takes specific exercises to learn how. I am wound so tight that breathing properly is extremely hard for me and using it to unlock my body is a long and arduous process.

Gus is getting old, she is getting bitchier. Her personality mirrors mine pretty closely, fourteen years together is a long time.

At the beginning of the year as a resolution type thing whenever Gus would start acting up and taking it past play fighting to OUCH DON’T BITE ME, instead of getting all super mad and OUCH DON’T BITE ME I would calmly look at her at eye level and repeat while petting her “this is the year of a calm Gus, I will not engage you”. Adam probably thought I’d keep at it for a day. But I’m still at it because without even knowing it I made a natural progression from learning how to breathe and calm myself to also changing my energy.

The thing is I have always been well aware of the energy I put out into the world and it has for the most part always been negative I just did not give a shit I really didn’t.

I don’t pay for therapy, if I’m not working, if I’m not making progress EVEN if I relapse here and there he has no reason to expend the positive energy it takes to help me, especially when there have been months at a time when talking to me is like talking to a brick wall, where I’ve spewed nothing but negative energy and he must have been frustrated as shit but he always waits me out.

There are ways that I practice learning that I made a huge part of my life before therapy, I’ve always been able to accept the reasons why people come in and out of my life, I call them good teachers and bad teachers, but if you were a bad teacher for me it in no way means I think you are a bad person, it just means I learned a lesson from you that came from a negative situation. I feel this helped me when I was single and dating, I always knew that what I was putting out was what I was getting back, I remember even buying He isn’t that into You for a friend. You can’t put out sexual sexual sexual and then get pissed off when a guy doesn’t call you back after he bangs you and you email him and you call him again and you page him and you lose your mind because YOU want a relationship. HELLO, just the other ‘night’ you were pressing those girls up into his face and dropping those panties weren’t you? Hmmm I wonder why he went RUNNING.

Even though I have always been a willing participant when it comes to learning new things and learning form my experiences with other people it never dawned on me that the energy I was putting out there was a major part of what holds me back.

My shrink started to suggest that I watch The Dog Whisperer, he suggested it a lot of times before I did but he had also started to talk about energy and how strong it is and for some reason it all just clicked at that moment that even though I hadn’t and don’t practice it all the time, I realized that I decide what I’m going to put out there and even though I have no control over what I get back, I decide, I live with the consequences of not just my action but my energy. If I leave the house having decided to stand tall and portray positive energy even though I woke up to some horrible song screaming in my ear and washed my face with shampoo and forgot to take my tampon out and am just bitchy but just because I’m bitchy doesn’t mean I have to project it onto everyone around me whether unconsciously or not. The Dog Whisperer comes in because this Cesar dude has tapped into this and is making himself millions it is pretty fascinating and beyond helpful watching him ‘fix’ the owners it is rarely the dog that needs the ‘real’ help. I know there are lots of ways to learn how to redirect your energy and how to have it help you in achieving a more positive lifestyle this just happened to work for me. I talk about animals a lot in therapy, I guess the Doc saw an in, who knows but I watch the show a lot mainly because it reminds me to practice the projecting. And what a coincidence that I had already started to practice trying to change my energy towards my cat and didn’t even realize it was going to help me in my day to day life.

The most rewarding thing about learning how to control and direct your energy is that it contains instant gratification. It doesn’t take as much work as learning how to breathe into all of the separate areas of your upper body and deeeeeep deeeeep down into my diaphragm all it takes is deciding to project positive thoughts. I don’t always decide to, but the thing is I never ever used to even think about it, I had no awareness at all for what was going on around me and how my energy was affecting other people. And I don’t know much but I do know I’m happier, not all the time but when I concentrate on it and make a point of watching the show and when I don’t make snotty comments about whoever or whatever, I know it makes me feel good about myself. Almost grown up or something.