i like smelling stuff
i constantly smell my armpits and the armpits of my tops while i’m wearing them and when i take them off i give them an extra special whiff and i smell the armpits of adam’s shirts which is gross cause his smell badder - mine can smell bad but i LOVE the smell of MY armpits. sometimes i’ll even grip the material and pull it towards my nose so that none of the arm-pity goodness goes to waste AND it is left lingering on my fingers so i can ‘sneak whiff’. does life get any better?
[if only it stopped there]
[the smelling ‘stuff’]
ONE of my nicknames for adam is stinky. i told him he is more than welcome to call me stinky too because i think it would be cute. it isn’t that adam STINKS, he doesn’t even need deodorant. it’s that i have a nose worthy of a canine super hero. i can’t figure out why i insist on smelling his shirts BEFORE I put them in the laundry basket when i know even with my left nostril’s deviated septum what is coming. [which half the time he’ll take back out and keep wearing] i just can…..not…..stop…..myself…..
i also think it’s funny when tuesday rolls around and i haven’t showered since sunday because who needs to shower on monday when you have no job? i get to pilates, take off my socks and i’m like ewwwwww my feet fucking STINK. so then i spend the whole hour worrying that jerks can smell my feet when i know full well none of them have a worthy enough nose and if they did we’d have to have it out because there is only room for one human wannabe canine super hero sniffer in the class and the whole West End of Vancouver for that matter.
