[b]When this stage of this tattoo was finished it was winter.[/b] I still gotta add in flowers. It was December to be exact so even though not overly cold here winter none the less and it was always covered unless I was at home because at home I have been known to wear tank tops year round so if you wanted to see it you had to be visiting and I had to be in a tank top or I had to say HEY wanna see my new tattoo.
I’ve always been a bad tattoo gawker atter type person. I won’t approach someone other than say a slight lean in and I don’t randomly start talking to people about their tattoos but I am a gawker. I will strain my neck out as far as it will go to see WHAT IS ON THAT ARM or leg or neck or exposed part that shouldn’t be exposed in public part. But of course I never thought about it. I just love tattoos and I like to people watch. I become fixated easily and do get caught staring a lot. Some strangers probably think I’m certifiably insane when I have my stare face on.
All of my other tattoos are small I had no idea what I was in for. NONE. 
At first it was simply funny. People were staring at me a lot, turning back to look before they were fully past me. I knew it was just the arm but it still took some getting used to once unveiled before the random eyes of the public giving me a taste of what I’d been doing to other people for years. At first it made me insecure, I was not used to that much attention, I’m used to being stared at for being loud rude and obnoxious not for art. People would say things to me which didn’t surprise me but didn’t impress me either because I had made a point of not doing that to other tattooed people but I do understand if you put a piece of art like that on your body that big some people are going to ask about it. Ask about it on the sky train, the street, in stores, restaurants, when I’m walking down the street on my cell phone and etc.
Other than in writing in comments on gus greeer and one on my flickr and through word of mouth no one has ever to my face said anything negative about it. Key words ‘to my face’. I take issue with people who get tattoos just to get fucking tattoos and put no thought into them and basically take them off the wall because they think they are cool. Un huh you are SO cool. Temporary tattoos exist for a reason. I have no problem with people hating mine I just think it is funny when they say mean things about it and then find out how personal it is it may not make them like it anymore but they look like assholes. It isn’t very comfortable for people when they do ask about it because they normally think it is a panther and get a no it is my cat. ‘Oh you have a black cat’? No she is grey. ‘And the scull butterfly thing’? That is dedicated to someone who killed himself. Followed by blank stare and uncomfortable silence.
But then I got used to it. Enjoyed it, sucked it in, ate it up. Let it give me confidence; let it make me feel tough. It is intimidating looking. It gave me this weird sense of security. It has also helped in my learning to be nice to people who ask stupid questions.
Now it is fall here. Vancouver does have a really hard time giving up their sandals and tank tops, they’d rather just put a winter scarf around same said out fit and call it warmer clothing. But it is colder and therefore my tattoo is now covered out doors. I didn’t notice it at first but then like walking into a tree branch as I do with regularity it hit me. I’m not so tough looking anymore. This sucks. Give me back my new identifier tag. I was thinking I’d just cut the arms out of my shirts but leave the shoulder and forearm part so I feel tough again. This is an insane revelation I had no idea I had let it go to my head like that until I couldn’t hide behind it because it was fucking covered. Here I was thinking I was all confident for reals now and it was only because of an arm tattoo. Holy I really pulled one over on myself. Whatever the stupid confidence is in me but I’ll probably still cut all my shirts up.
