The Words That I Say
It is not uncommon in various types of conversations for me to utter the words ‘you never really know anyone’, it normally goes unnoticed or is likely viewed as a loaded statement leaving it ignored. I said those words to some random guy whilst conversing outside the Holly McNarland concert a while back and the jist of his response in his wasted state was basically that I was full of shit. He is entitled to his opinion and being unused to being challenged on those words that do make a particularly strong statement, I was left fairly tongue tied and unable to elaborate realizing that I never mean it in a positive way and explaining would have been an instant downer. Significance = Believe it or not, I shut it.
I am not going to say that nothing shocks me. That would be a blatant lie. But in February 2003 when I lost a close friend to suicide parts of my life changed forever and with no note and with his closest friends unaware that he even suffered from depression and having known him in one of the more open and intimate friendships I have allowed into my life I decided to accept that I didn’t really know anyone and that I never would. Some people keep their secrets secret, and those who don’t I no longer believe are telling all and that is their right.
So the ridiculous things surprise me less.
January 23rd, 2008 at 10:50 pm
As open as I am about my life, there is much about me that no one will ever know.
No one.
EVER.
January 23rd, 2008 at 11:30 pm
I totally agree. The one I use a lot is: “The only normal people out there are people you haven’t met yet.” I can’t even remember where I got this from, but it makes sense to me.
January 24th, 2008 at 12:14 am
I think you’re right. You can never completely know someone. How boring would it be if you did?
January 24th, 2008 at 9:46 pm
“you never really know anyone”
….and yet, some of us may strive to be known…
I believe there is an elusive combination of trust and openness CAN bare ultimate truth. It may take the right person, and it may take time, but I demand it to be true otherwise each of us really are simply ‘full of shit,’ and I, personally, refuse to be full of shit for any longer than I have to be.
January 25th, 2008 at 1:09 am
Some facets of one’s persona are best kept private. Do you know how tempted I am to tell my Sister-in-law’s new husband she’s a habitual nosepicker and eater. Yup. Right out there in the open, when she thinks you’re not looking or paying attention, she’d do a quick pick and suck. She’s tormented my peripheral vision for years, the skank (and don’t think I don’t point and shout “Bogeymuncher!” because I do and it’s why she hates me). Of course…he could be fully aware and be perfectly alright with her snack preferences. Maybe they share.
Fact is you’re right, you never really do know someone. But would you want to?
January 26th, 2008 at 11:15 am
i don’t think we ever really know anybody. i’m not sure we even know ourselves all that well, even those of us who are very open to that journey. i’ve only ever had one person in my life who didn’t judge me. he comitted suicide too. i’ll always remember how that felt..to not be judged. consequently i was able to love him very openly. i miss that.
January 26th, 2008 at 5:58 pm
i’m afraid if i heard you say that.. i would simply reply: “yeah, no kidding.”