proud of you for sticking to your guns….that could not have been easy.
you are a strong person…..probably stronger than you realize.

i can see you’re on the right track even if cutting the puppet strings feels crappy (and it does). one day perhaps we’ll both have freed up enough personal happiness to be generous enough to allow them their faults without recriminations just as we would have them do ours-as independant souls on the planet. but i’m not that evolved yet-not with my parents. i started with less emotionally loaded relationships……we never get our childhoods back to mould and shape as we would have had them, but our adulthood can be the way we want it to be and we can be just that little bit better than the last generation as these move on and fade away. sometimes i think my dad will never understand the hurt he causes. this is to be pitied, for me, not despised. i think it’s sad he is so self-involved that he does not see. he is missing out on both his daughters and his wife too- but well..we can only change ourselves. you’ll be ok.

Plus, I hope to find someday what you and Adam have. The only reason to say such things in my opinion is pure jealousy.

xxx

I now have very little to ever do with my father, after all he has done and said to me, it has been 35 years of verbal and mental and emotional abuse.

I used to carry around a lot of anger toward him, now I just realize, I can’t make him care, so I don’t care. It has been very freeing to let go.

Sadly my brother lives with my dad, and I have to see my father now and then, I am pleasant, keep the peace, but I don’t go out of my way to accommodate him. My brother constantly complains about my father’s behavior. Most recently my father “un-promised” something to my 9 year old niece. Seriously! My father said, well then I “un-promise” to get that for you! He is emotionally challenged. Some people never change.

I used to “try” and hoped that every time I reached out to “fix” our relationship that it would be the final time and it would be better… it never happened, so I gave up hoping to ever have a father in my life. Once I let go of that hope, a big weight came off of me.

You don’t need me to tell you your father is so wrong about all that he does and says. You know it, it is merely a matter of it not emotionally getting to you. I hope one day everything he does bounces off of you without hurting you. Don’t give him the satisfaction of hurting you.

I recommend keeping a close circle of friends who love you like you need to be loved. Nurture your Self through them.

The bit about your hubby leaving you? That was a royal mind-fuck, made to belittle you and make you feel unworthy of love. You ARE worthy! We all are!